Wednesday, January 25, 2012

The Canadian

Months ago i had a little rendez-vous with a Canadian. He was a tourist visiting sydney for 10 days. Let's call him Ray. I met him through grindr on one boring sunday night. I was chillin' with my friends in her apartment in the city, They were doing sex and the city marathon and i was bored as hell. So i just said hi to Ray's profile. He replied and tell me that i'm cute. I was flattered so we have a chat and i asked him wether he was interested for a beer, I know he was travelling alone and he must be looking for an adventure. His hotel is not that far from my friend's apartment and it was close to midnight, i have no idea where to take him but i was just gonna go for it. I love an impromptu dates. Dates as in meeting up for getting to know each other sans sex. So i agreed to him at the corner of Oxford st and Wentworth Avenue in the middle of the night. He's not a bad looking guy but not a gorgeous guy either. He's an average guy. 6'1" tall, 42 years old. has very great smile and thick Canadian accent.

When i met him at first the conversation was a little awkward but we managed to get to know each other better as the clock was pushing towards morning. We had a blind walk around teh city trying to find somewhere to drink but everything was closed on that sunday night. We walked quite far from the city to woolloomooloo and kings cross, i soon got to knew him better. He was neither flirtatious or sleazy, just friendly. I wasn't getting the sex vibe, but i had great time with him, we exchanged stories, thoughts, and smiles. We had a little snack down at kings cross, i told him that the best time to have a cigarettes are after coffee, meal and sex. He thinks the same way and after we had our snack he said one out of three. We had coffee after down at oxford, and he said two out of three. i was hoping to for there three out of three. but then we ended up at Hyde park sharing cigarettes. He mentioned about his failed marriage of 14 years to a man, his kids (he has a biological son and a foster daughter and grand kids) He is a young guy at 42 but a grandpa. As the time passed by on that bench in Hyde Park. I was kinda tired, it was very ambiguous whether we were gonna have sex or not but It was 5am when he asked me to come upstairs to his room, At first i wasn't convinced that we were gonna have sex but then we had more talks and he cuddle me, then we were making out shortly after. Both of us were really tired, we agreed to meet him after for dinner then i kissed him goodbye.

The dinner was great. I picked him up from his hotel and we went to Newtown for Thai. he hinted that sex was on that night after dinner. He put his hand on my thigh on the cab I knew it was gonna be a great night. It was quite intimate, from dinner to back to his room. We had a talk again and cuddles, then kisses. He was a great kisser. The light was pitched dark, i think he was a little insecure about his body, even though he's not overweight, but he just has surgery scar on his peck. he lost weight recently and has toned body from  working out. The sex was intense and intimate. I took the role of being a top. he was usually a top but he was keen of me being in charge. Hot kisses, the feeling of me inside of him, the smell of his cologne, the sweat. He was in pure ecstasy, we did it mostly in one position but the intensity of the sex just blew my mind. It was rare for me to get that intimate with a person that i just met 24 hour earlier that night. When we finished, he collapsed on my arms and we cuddled after. I had to go home, I'm not a big fan of sleeping over. I am quite particular about gesture and affection. I reckon holding hands are more intimate than kissing, i don't hold hands of guys that i'm not really interested in. and sleeping over is not my favorite either. We agreed to meet each other again for brunch in 2 days. He needed to do his own thing and i don't want to follow him around for the rest of his stay.

That day we had brunch at bills, we has a fantastic day, followed by a pint of beer after. we stroll around from woollahra to the city. accompany him to the museum then we split. I knew that he's in town to have fun and i knew that i had to give him some space. even though we had a fantastic brunch date, i got a gut feeling that it was gonna be the last time i was gonna see him. He was on my mind for few days and I couldn't get the feeling over. So i braved myself to join him at a gay club, i knew he was alone and i would love to accompany him. just to see him again. Gay clubs are not my thing. It's something that i avoid but i just wanted to see my sweet canadian man so i did. He greeted me with a smile and he bought me a beer. We danced til close to midnight then he wanted to have coffee. I took him to coco cobano and we talked on the couch. We were holding hands together the whole time, he gave me little kisses and we embraced each other as if no one was there watching us. We called it a night i was hoping to get invited to his room but he gave me a big night hug and a kiss instead. He was clearly tired. he told me that he had been a very bad boy and had threesome the night before and erotic massage earlier that morning. But during the whole conversation he was really into me and appreciated the time that we had together. He was being honest to me. It was great. I told him that on the day we had brunch I had a feeling that he wouldn't want to see me again. He said that i over-thought everything. I felt relieved. He invited for a dinner the following day. It was his last night. I came home with mixed feelings but i knew that there's no future between us but i like him a lot. The next day I was hanging out at my friend's place and texted him to confirm, he replied that he told me he was really sick and he had to cancel. I was quite upset. then i asked him if i could come over and give him a goodbye hug he told me I shouldn't worry about him and apologize. He told me to keep in touch with him. I was very upset that i couldn't really close this one properly with a hug. I figure that i need to do something, so i wrote a note so the hotel concierge could deliver it under his door.

It took me few days to forget about him and he wrote me a facebook message couple of days after he got back home. It was very sweet of him to write to me, He told me that I was the highlight of his trip and he wished me well in life. I replied back few days after but he didn't reply back my mail. so that was it i thought. I didn't care about him much him. not until i saw him online few weeks after it was christmas eve, then i send him a greetings. he replied. he had a good chat, he was worried about me and how he thought he hurt my feelings. I sad i was fine. I didn't know why i did it but i called him in canada ust because i wanted to hear his voice. He wasn't very attentive because he sounded drunk but he convinced me that he wasn't then i told him "Hey you know what, you still owe me dinner. If i'm in town you should buy me a nice one" he said aI could come anytime and spend time with him. Maybe i'll do it in the future, or take his free dinner as a friend. the most memorable conversation that we had was he told me that he wished to stay a little longer. then i told him "If you stayed in sydney a little longer, then you might fall for me then". He replied, "Maybe I already have." My heart stopped for a second and pounded really hard it was like all the feeling rushing back into my head. I didn't admit that i had feelings for him but it was a nice conversation we had. At least i heard his sweet voice again. Life goes on and I should move forward.