Paparazzi

Last week, I was over the moon. having spent the most incredible weekend with a new friend who share the same passion of good music and good sex, My confident boost up again. I realized that i'm still very young and I've got really nothing to lose, and I've moved on completely from the whole shenanigans.

The day after Valentine's day, I was running down to the city to get my cheap cigarettes and meeting my best friend. On the bus, I saw a familiar looking car running down William st, it was Mr.Big's car. It wasn't his usual road. Some part of me wanted to call him and tell him that I've moved on and I met someone new. but I decided not to, I have no feelings for him anymore, and I believe that keeping distance is a wise decision for us right now. His heart is in Thailand now, where Chang, his Thai island loverboy is waiting for him. I just hope that they will be happy, I forgave him weeks ago. When i saw his car, It reminded me again that I couldn't avoid him. We live in the part of the town. We actually ran into each other several times unexpectedly.

After i ran my errands, I met my best friend with her friend at a Japanese sushi bar, It was great. I haven't seen her friend for quite a while. She noticed that I looked great and I was glowing. I told her that I lost a bit of weight because of Heartbreak. She understood, she had been through hard time as well, She just broke up with her boyfriend. But we were sharing some stories and reminding each other that moving on is the greatest thing ever. Suddenly, out of the blue I had a phone call. It was from Mr.Big, My instinct told me to pick up so i did. "Hey, how's it going" I answered with confidence. "hey you.."He said. "What's up?" me,just trying to keep it cool. "Someone saw you with a blond twinky guy last weekend" he said. On the back of my mind, Shit. but I'm flattered. I began to wonder, This is getting more and more interesting. i corrected him, "Red hair maybe, but not blond" I asked him how did he know about this? "Oh my friend Peter saw you the other day with a guy and He told me". Grrr.... on the back of my mind. I hate his friend peter, He was the insensitive Chinese guy who bluntly called me that I'm Mr.Big's sugar son because I'm quite privileged. Me and Mr.Big had a big argument before Christmas because of this. Back to the conversation so i told him "Oh Peter, the guy who called me sugar son, isn't he?" "haha, You won't forget about that won't you?, So who's this guy?" he was very curious about Oliver, because he's not what Mr.Big's had in mind of a guy that i'm gonna see next after him, and They're completely total opposite. So I just told him "Oh yea, I'm seeing him now" He sounded a little jealous and the situation is getting awkward. "So what's his name?" Mr.Big asked. "You don't really have to know, Hey this is a little uncomfortable, can I just call you back and explain later, thanks." I hung up. Haha I had never felt better, dropping a bomb to someone who broke my heart. My confident boost up even more, and on top of that My friend kept telling me how good i was after i lost couple of kilos. It was a really good compliment.

My sister called me that day, She told me that her partner saw with with a guy and wondering who might that be. My sister knows about me liking guys. I came out to her a month ago, and She has been very supportive. I was even over the moon, it was like I were on Gossip girl and someone spotted me with Oliver around town, even though we've only known each other for days. paparazzi moment. It felt a little scary, how small the city is. What are the odds of 2 different people saw me on the street with Oliver around town. It freaked me out, but at least i got the attention that i needed to build back my confidence and I never felt better. This year is going to be great for me. I feel that this time around, This is my Rebirth.